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Excellent work, Alex.
My understanding is that specificity is the key here. I know this as someone who has been reading his Envisioned future statements every morning for the last few days and found them wanting. Brian’s critique seems to help with this thought and I would not have much to add. I can only recommend the practice of reading it out loud to yourself every morning. This has helped me continue to refine and solidify. The goal is 90 days.
PS. Those recommendations are straight from Living Forward.